Friday, November 19, 2004

Turning to ムック for comfort~

It's really hard for me to express what mucc means to me. At times when I am depressed, or let down, or even mad with myself, all I have to do is turn on some mucc, and everything seems alright again.

I dug out something I wrote in a previous blog (that has since been wiped out by their terribly unreliable server). Luckily I had a draft of it in my harddisk. What I wrote was this (written sometime in March '04):

"現在情緒末名的激動﹐因為剛下載而看了mucc的<路地裏 僕と君へ>PV. 每次看到他們在熒幕上的演出﹐就會即興奮又痛苦. 興奮是因為對我來說﹐觀賞他們的演出幾乎就是達到一種完美的境界。 但痛苦是因為看PV只是那麼的短暫﹐一想到距離看他們的下一場live還有那麼長的時間(其實都不知道以後還有沒有機會)﹐就難免有點無奈.

無法的形容﹐在看他們演出時的情緒. 為什麼覺得似乎是個完美的境界﹐其實就是他們音樂和表演融合起來給我的感受﹐那種整個心都將近要掏出來的感受. 其實我不知道也不管他們私下是怎麼樣的人﹐我只知道在台上的那一刻﹑那一幕﹐他們是多麼的完美.

一生中很少有這種感覺. 其實想起來﹐即使是如拿到會考成績單﹑工作被表揚﹑甚至第一次戀愛﹐也沒有過這種看live時的激動. 或許我真的是live命吧. 但也不是每個live都有這種力量. 還是靠一個'緣'字。"

While a lot of it still holds true now, one thing has changed. I DO care about the members off the stage. I DO care about the 深厚感情 that they have with each other, with other bands and with the ones they love. I DO care that they are people with their own quirks and strengths and fears, and how they have also given me what I did not expect them to.